Sunday, December 14, 2008

Day 28: I've been replaced

Unlike me she keeps her razors in my shower. Her toothbrush sits on my sink. And her key probably works in my door.

I know I shouldn't let this bother me. It was bound to happen sooner or later.

What "kills" me is that I'm paying for the place where she sleeps with my husband.

I say kills because yesterday my heart ached so intensely I irrationally believed I might die from the pain.

But as the cliche goes: this morning was a new day. I woke up. I did yoga. I cleaned. I talked to my dad.

It still hurts when I think about it, but I know it won't crush me.

(Thanks to Alicia Solario for the photo.)

2 comments:

Chris said...

Your journey takes me back to the worst, and most valuable, time of my life. Next year will be 20 years since my divorce, and while the pain and doubt and loneliness have faded, I can still see that place from here. It's hard to think of anything to say that isn't cliche, but time is your friend. That, and your obvious internal strength. And writing definitely helped me through it.

I'm sure the path you have chosen is right. You will know when the time is right to start feeling single again. Please know that there are literally millions of people out there who have walked the path you are traveling who are silently pulling for you.

Good luck.

brataloid said...

Thanks! It's good to hear from someone who's survived it.